Sunday, April 30, 2017

Weekend Drawing

I was free this weekend so on Friday, I was trying to figure out what would be the most fulfilling things I could do, that could help to refuel me. Interestingly this was a harder question that I thought. I realized I actually find myself hungry for more in life and I need to shake things up a little. If I ask myself that same question I posed to you guys months ago- what do you discuss and who do you discuss it with, I have to reflect and say a lot of my relationships are still based on conversations about maya only. Am I spending time with people who inspire and challenge me, who will be there for me when I need them? Can I actually be honest in these friendships in sharing both what is important to me and equally what I am struggling with and afraid of? These are important questions to ask and re-evaluate every once in a while. So many times I have been challenged by the desire to be accepted and want other people’s approval instead of expressing myself for who I am. It leads you down the path of hiding yourself for the convenience of other people. I used to try hard to correct the conclusions people jump to, and their misinterpretations, and eventually I realized that no matter what you do, people kind of just frame things the way they want and it has nothing to do with you. It took me a long time to be able to put I into practice, but I finally have gotten to the point of just knowing who I am and what I need. So one of the things I did was I drew this picture last night. When I am insecure, I look at the Kaur inside me and ask if she needs approval from someone and it reminds me that I answer to God only, not other people. It reminds me not to change just for other people’s approval. I invested most of my time this weekend meditating on God because this is the one thing I am certain about. I have no doubt that spending a moment in remembrance of God is a good use of my time and the one most important relationship that really deserves more attention. After this weekend, I am feeling thankful and looking forward to God’s direction in finding what I need next. Sometimes the most important companions in life are met unexpectedly. Sometimes life requires patience, sometimes we need to take a leap of faith and go outside our comfort zone. 

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