Relationship to God, A Poem

Searched everywhere

in the corners of the world

in the pages of books

in the artist’s brush

the depths of my mind

still uncertain

Who am I?

Impressed others with

my success, my possessions, my position

but still no luck

found someone else to love me

build me up

still confused

Changed everything

to be like the others

just chillin’

chopped off my integrity

abandoned my responsibilities

enjoyed poisons disguised as pleasures

still unsatisfied

Pain slapped my face

punched me in the gut

dragged me down

again and again

and I complained how unfair

but on the ground I bowed my head

and found my place

at Your feet

For all the sacrifices

bloodshed for me to be able to be my true self

here I was, pretending to be someone else

I am Your child, Waheguru.  

I know a lot of people ask the question “Who am I” to ourselves directly or indirectly. Over and over we hear the message, you shouldn’t define yourself by your external beauty, you shouldn’t define yourself by your possessions, but a lot of people spend time defining themselves by their relationships too. Sometimes they just find one relationship after another because they can’t stand to be by themselves. They need someone else to fill the emptiness. Sometimes we define ourselves from our goals and achievements: “I’m smart, I’m the president of ____, I have such a prestigious position” And sometimes it takes years to get the things that we are waiting to define ourselves by- we spend time training for the job or getting the car and we still ask who am I? We are addicted to power and status and hold onto the labels to define ourselves but at the end of the day, we haven’t really found anything. The question remains, finding goal after goal and trying to achieve our way to finding ourselves.

I’m not saying that you need to give away everything to find yourself! You can still have possessions and relationships and find yourself, but you can’t use those things to define who you are. I am saying that finding yourself is about your relationship to God. Remember our Gurus encouraged us to doing sewa and having a family life, etc. it’s important while you are living your life to surrender yourself to God’s will and understand that you are God’s creation. Because your mind might be satisfied with all this other stuff, but what did you go through 8.4 million reincarnations to get to this human life form for? Don’t get lost in everything else and forget who you are. The answer has been inside you all along! 

By Manpreet Kaur