Hamster Wheel

I’ve been running on the hamster wheel for four weeks without a break. Around and around, I seem to get no breaks. Most times this happens, it is my body that reminds me that it isn’t acceptable, “either you slow down or I will slow you down” it tells me. Forcibly, it has pushed the breaks on me many times. I would get angry “why can’t this body just work the way I want it to?” Yet the answer was always obvious that I was ignoring that the state of my body and mind are completely interconnected and when the mind runs on the wheel, it ignores the signs of the body. I seem to ignore and bulldoze my way through life, imagining that ignoring the pain would solve it. Ignoring the fears and anxious mind, would solve it. As the days go by I would wonder why the activities of wellness no longer work. Increasingly tired, I give up on wellness and start to give, give, give just so I can get away from the overwhelmingness of what my body and mind is experiencing in the avalanche of personal circumstances. There’s one thing I found in my life- when it rains, it pours and pours. Yet it is not the circumstances that are to blame, it is the workaholic. Despite the fact that it is supported by work culture and society, it is a marked difference in the state of me humming and skipping around work, to looking like I am only half alive. 

One of my most kind-hearted colleagues and a great mentor to me had a conversation with me recently. He said our bodies are constantly renewing themselves, each cell- we know this through medical science. Why does it always have to renew itself in a bad way? It can renew itself in a good way and we can rejuvenate ourselves to a healthy state. Despite the fact that he wasn’t religious, we talked about common themes of contentment, faith, peace in life leading to that healing and renewal. The point not being to remove challenges, but to find contentment in them on a daily basis. 

When I get in this state of running and running I can recognize it earlier now. I remind myself it is time to start saying no, to allow time for connection to God through connection to myself and others. When I struggle the most with concentration on Gurbani, I need it the most. It is what is needed to “zoom out” and be able to see the big picture of what doesn’t even matter. It is time for reflection, listening to kathas, upbeat shabads, warm blankets and even colored nail polishes. Gurbani reminds us that we cannot live for tomorrow, for next week, for one more moment to feel normal. I can’t wait for a breath I don’t know if I will have because I am not guaranteed 100 years in this world. If things don’t happen the way we expected, we have to zoom out and realize it is all God. There is just You. Our minds have to stop being disillusioned because Maya wants you to run that hamster wheel forever. It wastes our breaths away, each breath we so preciously saved over 8.4 million lifeforms that we travelled through. Life is not lived in tomorrow and yesterday, it is now. Waheguru. 

Dressing for Winter

We covered winter driving recently. It is also really important to know how to dress in the winter. This is relevant not only to our International students coming from India, but also for locals as well. Those from Vancouver and Surrey visiting in the winter are usually also unprepared for the cold in Prince George. I have noticed our elders at the Gurdwara are often wearing thin layers of kurta pajama or Punjabi suit, with sandals or runners. Many people come with thin jackets and no gloves. 

Our temperatures in the next few days will drop down to -40 or below. This is not only uncomfortable but also dangerous. Just like your body can get hot and you can get heat stroke in the summer, your body can also get very cold and you can get hypothermia if you are out for long periods without adequate clothes. Just like your body can get burns from heat, the cold can give you burns as well. This is called frostbite, and it can get so bad that people’s fingers, toes, and ears can fall off. This is why it is important to protect yourself during the winter temperatures. It is not heroic to walk around in a t-shirt and shorts, it just isn’t smart and you are risking losing the very hands you work with and live your life with. 

To start with the basics, you should have a winter coat and winter boots. Winter coats are much thicker than the ones most people buy which are more summer coats really. They should have a temperature rating on them, and be good to at least -30 for places like Prince George. Often times coats can get expensive so look for sales, and remember they should last for several years at minimum. They don’t wear down as quickly as boots. Parkas are excellent for the winter- they are long and have a big hood on them (like the picture on the right). Try to choose a bright color as it gets dark early in the evening and it is hard to see people if they are wearing a white coat (matches the snow) or a black coat (matches the darkness). Have tags on your clothes (we dropped some off at the Gurdwara from ICBC or you could get reflective tape or a reflective vest yourself). These allow you to be seen when walking. If you want you can get a whole snowsuit instead of just a jacket. Its useful if you are going to be sledding, skating, skiing, or snowboarding. 

There are a lot of pretty boots but it is important to buy good boots and not just ones that look good. In fact many boots might be just regular boots and not designed for the cold weather and ice we get here in Prince George or other areas of Canada. You need to look at the bottom to check to see they have good traction. Check and see what temperature they are good for because they often tell you that the shoes are good to “-10” or “-20” etc. With the amount of snow we have the boots should come up to the middle of your shin at least like the ones in this picture. If they are too short all the snow will go inside them and you will get very cold feet. A good pair of boots can last you a few years. The key to having boots is they keep your feet warm, one of the main areas we lose heat and the second is to save us from slipping. If you are wearing running shoes most likely you will slip and fall on the ice. Many people with boots even slip and fall. One winter I fell on the ice three times so I know! Slips on the ice can obviously cause broken bones and head injuries or worse. If it is icy, there are a few things you can tie around your boots to make them stick into the ice so they don’t slip as easily. For example “YakTrax” or similar products, but you have to take them off when you get inside otherwise you will slip on regular floors (I had that happen to me!). Always wear your boots with socks. Please no sandals or jutiyaan!  

NOT helpful for the cold

Next comes hats, scarves, and gloves. Those with a paag obviously don’t have to worry about hats. For the rest of us we should be wearing something to protect our ears and our heads from losing heat. Hats with a warm fleece lining, or with a fuzzy layer inside (ex. heat holders) are best to keep you warm, not the fashionable ones with just a thin knit because those aren’t designed for cold. Scarves protect our face, and when people are really going into the snow for a long time they even wear a whole mask over their face with just holes for the eyes and mouth. Gloves once again are important in selection. Those thin ones with the individual fingers knitted for women are terrible because they are good for fall and not Canadian winter (see the pink ones). Winter gloves are once again rated for the type of cold, and will have a thick layer. You can get ones like that with the fingers free, or you can get ones that are mittens with all the fingers bunched together (like the ones on the right below). If you need to use your phone outside frequently you may want to get ones you can use your phone with, because normal gloves wont work. 
 

Lastly comes the importance of what you are actually wearing under all this outside stuff. Personally I wear long sweater dresses to the Gurdwara to keep myself warm. I have pajamis that are lined in a thick “furry” material inside that keeps me warm enough. Then I carry a shawl too in case its still cold inside. If you want to wear a kurta pajama or a Punjabi suit, you should wear long johns underneath (long thermal underwear). These are thin warm layers that go underneath your salwar or pajama, and kameez so that you don’t freeze. Nowadays you can buy warmer salwar kameez that are made of sweater knits. Invest in some good sweaters for the winter and choose warm fabrics for your winter clothes like fleece, wool, and knits. Wear long sleeves and long pants, not things you would wear in the summer. If the knits or sweaters are thick, you don’t have to wear anything under. I use a trick and just hold it up to light, if it has enough holes that its see through it’s a thin sweater and needs another shirt under it to keep me warm. Tip for those working in hospital: Mark’s Work Wearhouse has scrubs that are lined with fleece (I found them just perfect for inside the hospital). 

Hope you all survive the cold weather next week!

Picture references (I don't endorse any of these. I just chose random pictures).
https://www.rakuten.com/shop/bhfo/product/P1788383/
https://www.businessinsider.com/best-mens-parka
https://www.google.ca/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&ved=2ahUKEwiQ4Nn0vfrmAhVEqp4KHTRZDrcQjRx6BAgBEAQ&url=https%3A%2F%2Fpeople.com%2Fshop%2Fvbiger-vbiger-ski-mittens-warm-winter-mittens-waterproof-ski-snow-snowboard-gloves-black-cold-weather-mittens-for-women-men-p179979b6b02fba75824a5ca20dd04536.html&psig=AOvVaw0q07oSSYdf5rTTYa3CBqgX&ust=1578795546553990
https://www.walmart.com/ip/Men-Women-Full-Gloves-Solid-Color-Knitted-Winter-Warm-Gloves-Gold/178973671
https://www.google.ca/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&ved=2ahUKEwjn4LSkv_rmAhUIj54KHXNIAVkQjRx6BAgBEAQ&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.mysafetysign.com%2Fno-open-toed-footwear-iso-prohibition-sign%2Fsku-is-1185&psig=AOvVaw17MO5oGIa4LtX4iBCjrcGv&ust=1578795906679040

Happy Prakash Divas Guru Gobind Singh Ji!

This weekend we will celebrate the anniversary of Guru Gobind Singh Ji’s Birth! We should go back into our history and recognize what our Guru Ji taught us and celebrate Guru Ji’s coming into the world. As each year goes by I add more to these posts. 

Sri Patna Sahib

Our 10^th Guru, Guru Gobind Singh Ji was the son of Guru Tegh Bahadur Ji and Mata Gujar Kaur Ji (Mata Gujri Ji). He was born December 22, 1666 at Patna Sahib. This is one of our 5 Takhts and is in a state called Bihar. Due to the sacrifices of the Sahibzaade we celebrate Guru Ji’s birth in January instead of December. 

Guru Ji’s early education in Punjabi, Braj, Sanskrit and Persian was in Anandpur Sahib. Guru Tegh Bahadur’s Shaheedi occurred when Gobind Rai was only 9 years old. He had not hesitated in telling his father to make this important sacrifice stating, “None could be worthier than you, father to make a supreme sacrifice.” At such a young age, Guru Ji’s connection to God allowed him to give up his worldly relationships without question for a greater justice and purpose. Guru Ji went on to write great works such as Jaap Sahib and Chaupai Sahib which we read in our morning paath. 

Guru Ji was married to Mata Jito. There different theories- one is argued that Mata Jito was renamed Sundari, as women’s names would change after they got married and the name change to Sundari reflected her beauty. The other is that Mata Jito was a different person. Mata Jito was married to Guru Ji 1677. Meanwhile according to this theory Mata Sundri (Sunder Kaur) married Guru Ji in 1684 and her son was Baba Ajit Singh born in 1687. Mata Jito then had three sons- Baba Jujhar Singh (1691), Zorawar Singh (1696) and Fateh Singh (1699- the same year as the formation of the Khalsa). It is said that Mata Jito saw the future of what was to happen to the family, including the martyrdom of her sons, and she asked permission from Guru Ji to leave her body, thus leaving in December 1700. Her last rites were performed at Anandpur Sahib. Mata Sundari Ji was separated at Sarsa Nadi later, with Mata Sahib Kaur and travelled with Bhai Mani Singh to Delhi, rejoining Guru Ji at Talwandi Sabo in 1706 where she heard of the merging of Mata Gujri and the Sahibzaade with the eternal light. She went back to Delhi and adopted a boy she named Ajit Singh. She provided guidance after the Jyoti Jyot of Guru Ji, and issued her own seal and Hukamnamas, these still exist and date from 1717 to 1730. Eventually her adopted son was convicted for murder and put to death. Mata Sundri left this world in Delhi in 1747 where her last rites were performed. Mata Sahib Kaur was the spiritual wife of Guru Ji, not a physical marriage. Mata Sahib Kaur's family had proposed and in those times, a refused proposal meant that you would never be married. Guru Ji then agreed to a spiritual, not physical marriage. She became the mother of Khalsa, and we as the Khalsa are her children. She left this world in 1708 at Delhi. These two theories have been researched by different individuals- see Sikhiwiki for more information. 

Guru Ji was known as Kalgiyan Wale, as they wore a Kalgi on their Turban. It is made of feathers. Here are some pictures of Guru ji's Kalgis. Guru Ji is also known as Shaheshahnshah- the King of all Kings. 

Guru Ji also famously had a Neela Ghora (Blue Horse). Guru Ji was talented in horsemanship. This lineage of horses is now kept today at Hazur Sahib. Guru Ji had a Baaj, a white falcon. This is depicted in many paintings of Guru Ji. For this Guru Ji is also referred to as Cittay Bajanvala (keeper of the white falcon). There is a great website that shows original belongings of Guru Ji. Some of them are depicted below but you should also check out the link for the histories behind them: https://www.sikhiness.com/sri-guru-gobind-singh-ji-s-personal-belongings/  Below are pictures of Guru Ji's dastaar, sword, shoes, and arrows. 

Sri Kesgarh Sahib

Guru Gobind Singh Ji created the Khalsa in 1699, and this is celebrated on Vaisakhi every year. This is present-day Takht Sri Kesgarh Sahib. Thus came the image of the Sikh you see today, with the 5 symbols of faith (Kesh, Kangha, Kara, Kirpan, Kacchera) and ready to give their life to defend the innocent at any time. Guru Ji writes in the Zafarnama “When all other means have failed, it is but lawful to take to the sword.” The Rajput chiefs of Silvalik hills were disturbed by the formation of the Khalsa as the Sikhs did not believe in their system of discrimination based on caste. They felt threatened and tried to force Guru Ji out of Anandpur Sahib but were unsuccessful for five years. They got help from Emperor Aurangzeb and in 1705, and laid siege on Anandpur Fort in May (see picture of Qilla Sri Anandgarh Sahib). During this siege, 40 Sikhs left Guru Ji and said they were no longer his Sikhs. By December, Sikhs ran out of food and ammunition. Aurganzeb promised the Sikhs, on an oath of the Quran, that they would be allowed a safe exit if they left Anandpur Sahib. The Mughals betrayed their promise. The family was separated at the Sirsa Nadi (river). Many Sikhs, including Guru Ji’s four sons, Ajit Singh Ji, Jujhar Singh Ji, Zorawar Singh Ji and Fateh Singh Ji were martyred. He lost his mother Mata Gujri Ji at the same time as well. Many manuscripts were lost while trying to cross the Sarsa river. 

Qilla Sri Anandgarh Sahib

Guru Ji spent time in Dina where he received a letter from Aurangzeb asking him to come to Deccan to meet him, however Guru Ji rejected his offer and wrote him the Zafarnama in response, delivered to Aurangzeb by Daya Singh and Dharam Singh. In the battle of Muktsar on December 29, 1705, Guru Ji, Mai Bhago, and 40 Sikhs who had previously deserted the Guru Ji (as mentioned above), faced the Mughal army led by Wazir Khan. These 40 became known as the 40 Mukhte (saved ones).

Guru Ji spent 9 months at Damdama Sahib (Talvandi Sabo) finishing the Sri Guru Sahib Ji. This is another of our Takhts. It is said that the Zafarnama touched Aurangzeb and he invited Guru Ji for a meeting, however Guru Ji had already left for the south, and Aurganzeb died. Guru Ji then helped Bahadur Shah gain the throne after the death of Aurangzeb. Nawab Wazir Khan (the same person who ordered the killing of the young Sahibzaade) ordered the murder of the Guru Ji to be carried out by Jamshed Kahn and Wasil Beg. One of them stabbed Guru Ji, however Guru Ji killed the attacker. With the help of the Emperor’s surgeon, he was on the path to recovery. Several days later the wound burst open and started bleeding, but was again treated. Knowing that these were his last days, Guru Ji declared the Guru Granth Sahib Ji as his successor and became Jyoti Jyot. This was at Hazur Sahib (another of our Takhts) in 1708. This Takht is in Maharashtra state. 

Sri Hazur Sahib

Guru Ji describes his coming into the world in this shabad in the Sri Dasam Granth Page 132.

Now I relate my own story as to how I was brought here, while I was absorbed in deep meditation.

The site was the mountain named Hemkunt, with seven peaks and looks there very impressive.

That mountain is called Sapt Shring (seven-peaked mountain), where the Pandavas Practised Yoga

There I was absorbed in deep meditation on the Primal Power, the Supreme KAL.

In this way, my meditation reached its zenith and I became One with the Omnipotent Lord.

My parents also meditated for the union with the Incomprehensible Lord and performed many types of disciplines for union.

The service that they rendered the Incomprehensible Lord, caused the pleasure of the Supreme Guru (i.e. Lord).

When the Lord ordered me, I was born in this Iron age.

I had no desire to come, because I was totally absorbed in devotion for the Holy feet of the Lord.

But the Lord made me understand His Will and sent me in this world with the following words.

The Words of the Non-temporal Lord to this insect. 

Guru Ji was a warrior, a poet, a musician, leader, and took on so many other roles. He showed us what it truly means to be united and merged into the realization of God, by sacrificing his parents and children, and still remaining in chardi kala for all the Khalsa that is his family. He served as a brave and courageous warrior as well as a saint. May we remember Guru Ji’s contributions to our history as we celebrate the Prakash Divas of Guru Gobind Singh Ji, who brought us our identities as Khalsa. 

References

http://sikhism.about.com/od/gurugobindsing1/tp/When-Is-Guru-Gobind-Singhs-Birthday.htm

http://www.sikh-history.com/sikhhist/gurus/nanak10.html

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guru_Gobind_Singh

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Guru_Gobind_Singh

http://www.sikh-history.com/sikhhist/gurus/nanak10.html

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zafarnama_(letter) 

https://www.pinterest.ca/pin/301952349992275590/?lp=true 

http://www.theworldofgurunanak.com/guru-gobind-singh-ji.html

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Mata_Sunder_Kaur

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Mata_Jito

Igurbani

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Kalgi 

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/White_Falcon

http://news.ukpha.org/2009/07/sgpc-for-chemical-test-of-kalgi/

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/The_Blue_Horse_and_the_‘Neelay_ghoray_they_swaar’

https://www.punjabidharti.com/punjabi/sikhism/kalgi-shri-guru-gobind-singh-ji/ 

https://www.punjabidharti.com/punjabi/sikhism/dastar-kalgi-guru-gobind-singh-ji/ 

https://www.punjabidharti.com/punjabi/sikhism/kalgi-of-guru-gobind-singh-ji/  

Happy New Year 2020!

Happy New Year 2020! I know it is technically just another day, but it is also a great chance for reflection. May this new year bless us with Naam. May we get rid of our egos and doubts, and let our mind realize that there is only One Creator, One being inside and outside, pervading everything that is. 

May we sing our Gurbani with love and devotion. May we continue to serve humanity (do sewa of Waheguru) through our care of ourselves and of others. May we take action when action is needed, and accept what we cannot change. Now is the time to learn what you have been waiting to do. If you want to learn how to read Gurmukhi, learn it. If you want to learn to understand the translations, learn it. If you want to learn larivaar, learn it! Continue to learn each day and be open to challenging your ways of thinking. May we dedicate some time each day to our spiritual practice, until our whole life itself is a spiritual practice. 

Now is the time to remove all old grudges and just let go to be at peace. Clear up old miscommunications if you can and open lines of dialogue. At the same time understand that one's own peace doesn't rely on others and we can be fine within ourselves. Gurbani has so many treasures within it. Most of the time we have no concept of what kind of life we are capable of living. We look around and see people engrossed in maya, and think that's all there is, but Gurbani tells us that there is so much more richness to life than maya can offer us. Nothing material or physical comes close to the life that is lived in Anand. We have been given a huge gift to live our lives as Sikhs, and to get Guru Ji's guidance, and sadhsangat to guide us and help us on our path. We must make sure to utilize all the help we can on our spiritual journey. Ask questions, discuss with others, and work at it. I'm so appreciative of the people in my life that I get to do that with- the exchange of spiritual knowledge and stories is important and inspiring. Even more important are the opportunities to get to sit together and sing Gurbani, do paath, or simran. 

The program at the Gurdwara Sahib tonight starts with Rehras at 5:30 then kirtan at 6 pm. Come celebrate the New Year with us if you are local, and celebrate with prayers wherever you are in the world! 

Hair Care

I get comments about my long hair about 3-5 times a day. I’ve found it can be a great way to convince little kids to eat their vegetables! Most of them think I'm Rapunzel. Usually I get asked about how long my hair is when its open (past my knees), how long I’ve grown it (my whole life), and then questions about hair care. I thought I would share some tips from taking care of my own hair for most of my life. Of course if one has concerns about their hair like hair falling out they should see a doctor as sometimes it may be genetics, but other times it may be causes like low levels of iron, thyroid problems, etc. The quality of our hair reflects our general health in many ways. In fact I remember learning we can test hairs for toxins etc. that the person has taken. I personally found my hair was falling out a lot when I started med school from all the stress. It grew back but it sure was hard to see it thinning out and I know what a panic that feels like!

One of the biggest things for me that make brushing my hair manageable is having gotten a soft hair brush. If its wet, I wait until it dries. Then, divide the hair in half on each side. Twist hair all the way up to the bottom. Then, starting at the bottom, start to brush the hair with the soft brush. If you start at the top the tangles just build up and it is painful. Move your way up the hair until you can brush right from the top. I find this deals with any tangles a little bit at a time and makes it manageable. Then I repeat with a regular hairbrush with hard bristles to get the tougher tangles out. I only need to do that once or twice a week because the soft brush is great. If it is your child's hair you are caring for, let them hold it while you take out the tangles because that helps too. Most grocery stores should have them. 

Washing: Yes it takes a lot of shampoo and conditioner to wash long hair, but you don’t need to do it that frequently. I find shampooing just dries out the hair. I get asked a lot which shampoo I use because I think for some people think it helps to grow the hair, when in fact there’s a lot of other factors in one’s general health and genetics. Its nice to use a shampoo that works for you. I used to use Herbal Essences but then when they changed the formula at some point I seemed to get an allergic reaction so I started using Head and Shoulders Almond Oil instead. Find whatever works for you. I tried a really natural shampoo for a while and really liked that too. 

I try to let my hair dry naturally if possible. Blow-drying damages it visibly so I only do it on the cool setting for a couple of minutes if I really need to in the winter. In the summer it usually dries in 2 hrs. Its nice when the wind blows and dries it all in the sunshine. In the winter it can take most of the day to dry, so I find other things to do while it is drying. After it is dry, I put the oil on. I know that in India people are used to oiling their hair prior to washing. I find the shampoo strips the hair of all that anyways and it ends up super dried out... If I didn’t oil my hair it ends up being fuzzy and all over the place. Many different types of oils work. My mom told me people varied the oils in India depending on the season. They would often use mustard oil (saron da tel). Here we might say that has too strong of a scent. They would also use coconut oil. I found that the problem is that in the winter in Canada, coconut oil solidifies in the cold. You end up with hair that is literally frozen when you go outside, so it makes more sense for summer months or warm climates. I use almond oil and just buy it from the grocery store. I think the “tel chasna” – massaging oil into the scalp is a tradition that has gone on for so many generations and is an important part of keeping the hair healthy. It also is a great bonding time between my mum and I as she still does this for me. When I was living alone, I really missed that because it was a great time to chat and it was relaxing as well. Most people are shocked that I don’t have any split ends. I think its just a matter of not constantly drying and frying the hair with hair products and straighteners etc. and massaging in the oil. You have to put extra oil into the ends of the hair. 

Upkeep: I keep my hair in a braid. Its almost always the same everyday unless I have time to do something special with it like different hair designs. I find that keeping it open leaves it to get caught in too many things, although I do occasionally wear it down. People always comment they never get to see it open, but it is messy and I save that for special occasions. I find keeping it in a bun for too long a little tiresome. Women who wear a turban have told me that the scalp gets used to this over time and you adjust. There are some jobs like in the police where you have to keep your hair up too, so keeping it in a keski works for that situation well. For surgeries, I used to put my hair into two braids, and then wrap them around each other to opposite sides, and tie them in the back and put the surgical cap on which worked well. It also is better to wear it up if there are any safety issues with having your hair down or in a braid. I find it is most comfortable to keep it in a braid, so I braid it in the morning and then rebraid it looser at bedtime so I can sleep. 

Occasionally people want to touch my hair, and I let them because they asked or they knew me (please don't touch strangers' hair without their permission). I was at a colleague's house for dinner one day and got his 3 daughters to do my hair and they had lots of fun. They were all very young and learned about being gentle and not tangling up hair ties. Speaking of tangling, my worst hair story is probably getting my hair stuck in a hairbrush when I was in elementary school. I think I was probably about 10 or 11. It was a round brush so I thought I could curl my hair, but it actually got trapped and I couldn't get it untangled. My dad had to individually pull out the bristles of the brush and break it in order to get my hair out. We still have a picture of me trying to smile while my eyes are all red from crying in the panic that my hair wouldn't come out! That leads me to the note of being really careful what you do with your long hair and not getting it all tangled up. I have quite a few funny hair stories actually, including spending my childhood trying to jump over my hair like the monkeys in Jungle Book jump over their tails during the song.  

Since I have been taking care of it forever, my hair doesn’t seem like too much work. I know a lot more people who spend more time and effort styling their hair each day. I got told at one point that I should cut my hair short because I got told it was the cause of my headaches. The healthcare professional I spoke to had no idea about the cultural sensitivity or how upsetting that was. I thought to myself how is it possible to get headaches from my hair if it has been there my whole life. For generations, people have worn their hair in turbans and have much heavier thicker hair than me, what about theirs? So I ignored her advice. Keeping my hair was so important I decided to just live with the headache. In the end it actually turned out she was wrong entirely and it was unrelated to my hair- the headaches resolved. I shared that story because I think as Sikhs we do get told that a lot but it is something to think about whether it is real or not. 

I don’t judge anyone for their choices of keeping their hair or not keeping their hair. I don't think it is right to force our children or anyone else, but it is good to encourage conscious choices and decisions. My parents kept my hair long growing up and then let me decide, and by then it was very much a part of my identity and I never cut it. We all have our own individual journeys and for me I love the long hair on my head. I recently saw a Kaur at our Gurdwara Sahib who wears a colored keski that matches the outfit she wears, she looks absolutely graceful and beautiful. At the same time I know people who have short hair who have the utmost devotion and spirituality. We have discussed in past posts that our Sikhi actually starts from the inside with practicing our thoughts and actions. The Khalsa roop has a very important role as well, but we cannot force that upon anyone. It comes out of love on the path and comes with its own responsibilities. 

I hope my hair care post was helpful in providing some tips for caring for your own hair. I was trying to find a relevant picture of my hair and will update the post when I find a good one! 

Sahibzaade

As the week continues we remember our Sahibzaade and Mata Gujri Ji. I just wanted to share a great resource. Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji Academy is posting the history in detail with pictures. If you scroll down on the facebook page (you don't need a facebook account to access it), you can see the history starting from Dec 21's post. I read this to our family tonight, it was great reading through in detail. It is far more specific than I have ever read, for example I wasn't aware of the role of Bibi Sharan Kaur. At the same time it is easy to read and breaks it up into chunks. See the link below. 

https://www.facebook.com/sggsacademy/?__tn__=%2Cd%2CP-R&eid=ARAUTrY_MQF1RITc7hPCjUGxFJlELXVoiPSKMXTUpKrYYohvnIRF5jRx3IfnNL3hP-73IdFRhyWR7xtb

Four Sons and a Mother: Remembering Guru Ji's Family

Quilla Anandgarh (1/5 forts at Anadpur)

It’s the time of year that we remember the Chaar Sahibzaade, the four sons of Guru Gobind Singh Ji: Sahibzada Ajit Singh, Sahibzada Jujhar Singh, Sahibzada Zorawar Singh, and Sahibzada Fateh Singh as well as Mata Gujri Ji. This weekend we have an Akhand Paath to commemorate the older Sahibzaade, next weekend will be for the younger Sahibzaade and Mata Gujri Ji. 

This year for the first time we travelled to see Anandpur Sahib, Sarsa Nadi (the river where the family was separated), as well as the locations of the martyrdoms and Macchiware. I will add pictures of those through this post. 

Looking back at the history, it is important to reflect on what happened. The creation of the Khalsa united the Sikhs but the Rajput Hill Rajas became concerned as the basis of their power was a system of discrimination, which the Sikhs were against. The Raja of Bilaspur unsuccessfully tried to force Guru Ji to move from 1700-1704. These Rajput Chiefs then approached Aurangzeb, and with the help of his army and the Governor of Lahore, they laid siege on Anandpur fort in May 1705. The Sikhs stayed strong despite their limited resources. Finally, the Mughals grew tired and Aurganzeb made an oath on the Qur’an that the Sikhs could exit safely if they left Anandpur. After such a prolonged period with little food and ammunition, the Sikhs left in December 1705. The Hill Rajas and the Mughals broke their promise and went after the Sikhs. Anandpur Fort is actually unconquerable, it took this broken promise to bring the Sikhs out. 

On the night of December 5, 1705 Guru Gobind Singh Ji and his fellow Sikhs left Anandpur Sahib when it was raining heavily, and crossed the Sarsa river with the Mughal army pursuing them. Sahibzaade Ajit Singh (18) and Jujhar Singh (14) made it to the Fort of Chamkaur by December 6 with Guru Gobind Singh Ji and a group of 40 Sikhs. They suffered many casualties trying to cross the Sarsa, and many precious manuscripts of prayers were also lost in the river. On December 7, 1705 the enemy had surrounded Fort Chamkaur and the Sikhs had exhausted their ammunition and arrows. They were “a mere forty defying a hundred thousand,” in the words of Guru Ji. There were over 100,000 Moghul soldiers on foot and 700 mounted, pursuing the small group of 40 Sikhs. The Sikhs were left to fight with swords and spears only. At Chamkaur the Sikhs stayed in a mud two-story house. Very sadly, the original Chamkaur-de-Gari/Kachi Gari was demolished by the SGPC and replaced with a new Gurdwara Sahib.  Our original history has been lost just for the sake of modernization. See picture of the original Kachi Gari on the right (https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Gurdwara_Garhi_Sahib)

Guru Ji sent out his sons to battle. Sahibzada Ajit Singh and Jujhar Singh were martyred while leading other Sikhs into battle. Guru Ji writes in the Zafarnama (to Emperor Aurangzeb), “It matters little if a jackal through cunning and treachery succeeds in killing two lion’s cubs, for the lion himself lives to inflict retribution on you.” 37 Sikhs were martyred including 3/5 Panj Pyare. The remaining five Sikhs used their authority of Guruship and told guru Ji to escape at night, followed by three Sikhs. Guru Ji gave his clothing to Sangat Singh, and in the meantime escaped, as well as Bhai Dya Singh, Dharam Singh and Mani Singh. When the Mughals invaded the next day, Sangat Singh and Sant Singh were martyred. 

Gurdwara Thanda Burj
(cold tower where the Sahibzaade slept)

Meanwhile, on December 5^th Mata Gujri and the younger Sahibzaade Zorawar (age 9) Singh and Fateh Singh (age 7), and the cook Gangu were separated from Guru Ji. At that time it was winter and they were wandering through the jungles, so Gangu offered for them to stay in his home. Gangu was greedy and stole Mata Ji’s bag of coins. Mata Ji confronted him so he went to turn them in to the officials, who arrested the Sahibzade and Mata Gujri on December 8^th and confined them in Thanda Burj (Cold tower) at Sarhind (pronounced sar-handh). The tower was freezing at night and they were allowed nothing to eat or drink. They slept on the bare floor and listened to the stories of Mata Ji. She instilled confidence and courage. The governor of Murinda went to get the Sahibzaade to meet Nawab Wazir Khan and separated them from Mata Ji, telling them that their father and brothers had been killed but the Sahibzade refused to believe him. They greeted Nawab Wazir Khan with "Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!" and refused to bow down to him. He purposefully made the door to the room small so they would have to crouch down to enter (and bow), but instead they put their feet through first. He tried to get them to convert to Islam by bribing them with many gifts and riches but the young Sahibzaade stayed strong, even when they faced death. Baba Zorawar Singh told the Nawab that he lied about Guru Ji's death and that they would not give up their faith. They stayed another night at the Thanda Burj due to Nawab Sher Muhammad Khan’s insistence that they should not be killed. 

Gurdwara Sri Fatehgarh Sahib
(where the Sahibzaade were martyred)

The next day Nawab Wazir Khan ordered them to be bricked alive and when he hesitated due to Nawab Sher Muhammad Khan’s pleas, Diwan Suchchanand insisted that the children would grow up to be as their father was and they should not be spared. He is famously said to have used the example of a snake, "The offsprings of a cobra should be crushed." The brick wall was made as the Sahibzade recited Japji Sahib, but when the bricks reached their chests, the wall crumbled. Nawab Wazir Khan ordered them to be beheaded. Mata Gujri Ji passed away as well. Gurdwara Fategarh and Gurdwara Joti Sarup is now standing where Mata Ji and the small Sahibzaade were cremated. It is notable to say there has been some research done which I read on Sikhnet last year which also talks about the fact that the retelling of what happened is perhaps much milder than what actually happen to the younger Sahibzaade and they were actually tortured prior to being bricked alive.  

Tree under which Guru Ji
wrote the shabad

When Guru Ji learned of the death of his younger sons he told the Sikhs “I have sacrificed four sons for the survival of the thousands of my sons who are still alive.” He wrote the shabad, Mitry Pyare Nu Haal Murida Da Kahna while sitting under a tree at Machiwara forest.
"Tell the beloved friend (the Lord) the plight of his disciples. 

Without You, rich blankets are a disease and the comfort of the house is like living with snakes. 

Our water pitchers are like stakes of torture and our cups have edges like daggers. 

Your neglect is like the suffering of animals at the hands of butchers. 

Our Beloved Lord's straw bed is more pleasing to us than living in costly furnace-like mansions."

For a beautiful version of this shabad listen to this:

Guru Ji went to the house of Gulaba then visited Gani Khan and Nabi Khan’s home for two days and nights. The brothers were horse dealers and knew Guru Ji from Anandpur. They called him “Uch Da Peer”- the holy man of the old seat of Muslim Saints. Then Gani Khan, Nabi Khan, Bhai Dya Singh, Dharam Singh and Mani Singh carried out Guru Ji on a palanquin, disguised as their prophet so that Guru Ji could make a safe escape from the Mughals. He writes in the Zafarnama "What happened that you have killed four children (my sons), the coiled snake (in the form of my Khalsa) still remains. What manliness you have shown by extinguishing a few sparks (Sahibzadas). You have made the conflagration brighter and more furious." 

May we always remember the lives given so we could have the right to practice our religion today, and the bravery that these young Sahibzaade had in choosing the path that was right instead of what was easy. When we think about how this is possible that these Sahibzaade were able to make such a sacrifice, or that Guru Ji was able to cope with the loss of both of his parents and all of his sons. It is only through the understanding of what it means to be merged into God completely, that there is no separation, all is God. Their lives didn’t end or begin on this earth and they achieved mukhti; that they did what needed to be done.  

We remember the sahibzaade because their sacrifice means today’s freedom, and because their courage is our inspiration. Puneet Singh Nanda writes about qualities of the Sahibzaade that we can incorporate into our lives such as standing up against oppression, not giving up your path for worldly pleasures (they didn’t take the worldly goods offered as bribes), having faith, and learning that physical death is not to be feared if we can be jeevan mukht through our mind. 'Thoughtful Kaur' reminds us that an important part of remembering the Chaar Sahibzaade is remembering that as we are all Guru Ji’s children, we all have the potential to gain the amount of strength, courage, and faith that they had. We should be inspired by this story to read stories of our children as Mata Ji read to the Sahibzaade as it gave them strength, as well as to read Gurbani and build internal strength. 

Links to poems about the Sahibzaade are below. I read Je Chalo Ho Sarhand Nu today at the Gurdwara and will be trying to read throughout the week in the evenings as well as on Wednesday. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CjdKr6KTSgw 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q1iQhh3Ps0o

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgLzn8ovDNg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpdK-6_jyNw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smMIdcndDbw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe1aSTZIfGc&t=199s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7WZf7OLZMQ

I sang these and posted them on my youtube channel as well: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaJVqGlOz5r_yLZk2KkcenQ 

References:

http://www.sikhspirit.com/khalsa/sahibzadas.htm

http://sikhism.about.com/od/Historic-Events/p/Battle-Of-Chamkaur-And-Martyrdom-Of-Elder-Sahibzadas-December-1705.htm

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Char_Sahibzade

http://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Supreme_sacrifice

http://www.sikh-history.com/sikhhist/martyrs/sahibzade.html

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Mittar_Pyare_Nu

http://www.sikharchives.com/?p=11713

http://www.zafarnama.com/Download/zafarnama.pdf 

A History of the Sikhs Volume I 1469-1839, 2nd Edition by Khushwant Singh

https://thoughtfulkaur.wordpress.com/2016/11/13/chaar-sahibzaade-2/

http://sikhprofessionals.net/wahegurus-way/adopt-8-qualities-of-chaar-sahibzaades-in-your-daily-life/

http://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Second_battle_of_Chamkaur_Sahib 

http://worldgurudwara.com/ajit-singh-and-jujhar-singh-the-two-elder-sons-of-guru-gobind-singh-martyred-21-dec/ 

http://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Supreme_sacrifice

http://www.historicalgurudwaras.com/GurudwaraDetail.aspx?gid=4276

http://www.historicalgurudwaras.com/GurudwaraDetail.aspx?gid=4277

http://www.historicalgurudwaras.com/GurudwaraDetail.aspx?gid=4275

http://www.historicalgurudwaras.com/GurudwaraDetail.aspx?gid=4253

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Gurdwara_Keshgarh_Sahib

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Forts_of_Anandpur_sahib

http://www.discoversikhism.com/sikh_gurdwaras/gurdwara_sri_thanda_burj_sahib.html

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Thanda_Burj

http://www.historicalgurudwaras.com/GurudwaraDetail.aspx?gid=3984

http://www.discoversikhism.com/sikh_gurdwaras/gurdwara_sri_bhatta_sahib.html

http://www.discoversikhism.com/sikh_gurdwaras/takht_sri_keshgarh_sahib.html

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Gurdwara_Bhatta_Sahib

http://www.discoversikhism.com/sikh_gurdwaras/gurdwara_sri_manji_sahib_anandpur.html

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Gurdwara_Katalgarh_Sahib

http://www.discoversikhism.com/sikh_gurdwaras/gurdwara_sri_chaubara_sahib_machhiwara.html#gallery[gallery1]/3/

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Machhiwara

http://www.historicalgurudwaras.com/GurudwaraDetail.aspx?gid=4271

https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Gurdwara_Garhi_Sahib

Winter Driving Tips

I know a lot of our international students from India locally are driving in the winter for the first time so I thought I would share some winter driving advice.

My first and most important advice would be winter tires. Not only is it mandatory to have winter tires, but also safety-wise is necessary for places like Prince George where we get so much snow. If you are still selecting a vehicle or have a choice, do not choose a small vehicle as they are less safe in conditions like the ones we have here. When in an accident, it'll just get crushed. I’m so happy that I got an SUV with four-wheel drive because it makes it a lot easier to get around. Many people also don't realize that trucks need to be weighted properly otherwise they just slide around too because the back is too light. 

I got an ugly surprise when I went out to my car today after work and it was covered in a foot of snow. Always be prepared to spend time cleaning off your car properly in the mornings and don’t rush it. It takes time for the ice to be scraped off properly enough to see through the wipers, and its unsafe to drive without clearing off the windows (front, back and sides). Keep a scraper/brush and shovel inside your car. Also clean off the top of your car! I had some friends who were driving in the winter for the first time and didn’t realize you had to clean off the top. When they stopped at the red light at the intersection, the entire pile of snow blocked their windshield. Classic mistake! When parking, put your wipers up in the air so they don’t freeze to the windshield. 

Lights: Keep your lights on. I have a white vehicle which can be difficult to see in white-out conditions in the snow. The automatic lights sometimes don’t go on because it thinks its light out. So turn on your lights (but don’t leave them on when you turn off the car because that drains the battery. In my case I accidentally did that once and I couldn’t get into my car because it starts by a button and not a physical key.) While its important to have lights on, don’t put the high beams on because they flash in people’s eyes who are driving at you and they can’t see. When pre-heating your car it is dangerous to do inside the garage, even with the garage door open, make sure the car is in a well ventilated area. 

Important things when driving are to keep your distance in the winter, allow a lot more distance when stopping and in the car in front of you. I had three pedestrians run across the street today, make sure to drive slow and be prepared. I cannot emphasize enough how many accidents happen from distracted driving (texting, calling, etc.). Its dangerous and not worth your life, or someone else’s. imagine how terrible it would be to kill someone because you were texting and not looking at where you are going. It can wait. When turning, slow the vehicle and then turn. Don’t have your foot on the brakes as its turning. My dad taught me that when I was learning to drive. The car tends to go in a straight line if you skid, per the laws of physics. 

Snowtrucks usually clear off the snow at night. Keep a safe distance away as they might not see you. Recently we had this problem at the Gurdwara Sahib and the committee wanted everyone to know it is dangerous to walk or drive close to the big trucks because they cannot see you! If you park at the side of the road you will get snowed in and it takes forever for you to dig your way out. 

If your tires are spinning and you are stuck, drive slowly. Don't press hard on the gas or you will just get into a bigger mess. Keep a blanket and emergency supplies in your car in case you get stranded, especially if driving in the middle of nowhere like we do in some places without cell service up North.

In the cold: Lift off windshield wipers before you leave your car parked so they dont get stuck to the windshield. They can break off if the car keep trying to use them and they are stuck. Plug your car in. 

The worst driving conditions I drove in was a time when I was driving back from Fraser Lake to Prince George and it was heavy snow + fog + I didn't know which was the road was going. Everything was completely white and I couldn't see the cars in front of me. I was terrified and lucky I made it home safe. I could see on the map I was coming up to a bridge because there was water but I was so scared I was going to drive off the road as I didnt know which direction to go. So that brings me to my final point: avoid driving entirely if the conditions are ugly and dangerous, its not worth it.