What are Sikh values and characteristics? We think of honesty (sach), selflessness, humility, standing up for what’s right, fearlessness (nirbhou), without hate (nirvar), equality, work ethic (kirat karni), service (sewa), sharing (vand ke shakna), positivity (chardi kala), compassion (daya), love, contentment, and remembrance of God (Nam japo). Our identity as a saint-soldier (sant-sapahi) captures that our role is to be a sant before we become a sapahi, that in order to be a fearless warrior in life you really have to connect deep within oneself.
One of the other qualities I was thinking of today was excellence. The Khalsa has always held itself to a high standard of thoughts and actions. There is a reason we have the saying “Sava Lakh Se Ik Ladaun, Tabhi Gobind Singh Naam Kahaun” translating to “Call me Gobind Singh only when each of my Sikhs will fight 125, 000 soldiers.” We know the degree of skill the Sikhs had in using weaponry from our history, such as the battle of Chamkaur and the battle of Mukhtsar. In that extreme excellence the Sikhs were grounded in humility. I feel like Bhai Gurdas’ Vaar 18, explains this well: “Alas! Were it so that shoes made of my skin were used by the Sikhs of the Guru. Whoever gets the dust of the feet of such people is fortune and blessed.” The Sikhs were not boastful about their excellence but rather carried it as a grace of God to protect the oppressed. I think we all have an area of life that we could pursue. For some it might be their profession, but for others it might be sports, hobbies, or music. Some people show a lot of excellence in how they maintain their hair and beard, and do their daily paath. I think this teaches values of discipline, determination, and perseverance which are all incorporated into Sikhi. We simply don’t just give up as Sikhs- we set out to do something well despite the barriers and challenges that face us. In fact, people’s stories of excellence are inspiring regardless of whether that is an area which we wish to pursue or not. I think that’s why TED talks are so popular because we learn something from the process of hearing someone overcoming challenges in an area, which we can universally apply to our own situation. Lately I’ve been talking to Sikhs who are practicing excellence in different ways. It has inspired me and makes me feel excited for the Sikh community. We have not lost these qualities; they have just changed form to the modern world and is a little bit harder to see in between all of the noise of maya.
I think recently I was in a space of feeling frozen. The thought crossed my mind of why am I making the harder choices- the compassionate, understanding, giving person, when the world is so harsh and I quite simply just feel used. I was hurt by the betrayal of the world (maya), while at the same time maya was sucking me in even deeper by convincing me this betrayal was betrayal of God, and that I should just stop making the hard choices. My faith has kept me this far in life but that pull of the thoughts each day was hard to ignore. It kept coming up over and over- why are you continually empathetic when it just comes back to hit you in the face? The alternative of being cold and uncaring is just not fathomable. This loving flowing Divine energy is just waiting to be given. Yet sometimes it hurts to care, when you have given away the entirety of your being and yet still, it isn't enough. It is maya itself that has deceived us and that too is written.
The moment I finished the santhiya of the 7 daily Banis, something changed. Meeting different sangat, even virtually, has given me an awakening. The path of a Sikh is very narrow. Anand Sahib says that it is sharper than a two edged sword and finer than a hair (Pauri 15). We all have to make that choice to keep going on it, even when we are tired, even when we are hurt, even when we are wondering why, we simply have to just keep going because the alternative is described well in Gurbani. If we don’t follow this path now, after 8.4 million lifetimes to get this human life, to practice the values and characteristics that represent a Sikh, then we have wasted all of this. If you don't give that love, where does it go anyways? What's the point? I would much rather give this unbounding endless love inside, coming from the Divine, than to hold it tight and become bitter. It is not an energy that I created, it was created by the One and cannot ever be taken back. You wrote that I give away this love. Eventually if you keep going, the winds of maya will no longer touch you and you can walk solidly. There is no expectation for us to be perfect, but rather to look at this mind daily, and to improve. We all make errors, it is simply just doing better each day. Reading paath reminds us about how to live life, it reminds us about reality and falseness, it reminds us of what is up and what is down. My fellow sangat has given me two important pieces of advice. The first is that we must be incredibly careful of who comes into our inner circle, of choosing people who are inspiring to us and challenge us to do better, who teach us something. Those that see the Divine in themselves and treat others as Divine. I am slowly realizing that while I might be inspired by someone they might not derive any inspiration from me, or be challenged to learn more, and that I need to just let go of the ego involved. Second, I have been given the directive that I have to cross this ocean and help others cross too. Whoever is in that inner circle must be at least understanding this, that we help each other cross together.
I have been trying my best to share my experiences on this blog. They are messy but life is messy. The reason I share it is for us to know that we aren’t alone if we experience those setbacks and that there is some learning in each part as we keep moving. It isn’t entirely linear. I want to go home just like all of us and I keep reminding myself of Sheikh Fareed’s shabad, “Fareed, the path is muddy, and the house of my Beloved is so far away. If I go out, my blanket will get soaked, but if I remain at home, then my heart will be broken.” One day someone said to me "I have a pain, not a real pain, but a deep internal existential ache" and I really related to that. I think we all should be having that ache, it is our sign of our desire to go home, of our mind's thirst for union with Waheguru. It is a sign that we still have a ways to travel to get to that home. We have to keep moving no matter what, but it is worth holding up your reality to Gurbani and seeing what is real and what isn’t. There is so much that is not real, including our thoughts and words. Maya is speaking, doing, acting and the trickery has us pitted against each other, causing fights and conflict. Only if we search for God and the Divine, can we let go and understand that all of that is not real. I have wondered if love can be false, and I have decided that the answer is that God is love, and therefore it is real, Truth, and can never be false. Moh is maya, but love is Divine. Never stop loving, giving, and moving because those are real.
P.S. I've accepted a job here so the blog's not going anywhere anytime soon!
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